Crutch

Where is reality? What are the actions that will define who I am?

I am capable more than it seems...

-More Than It Seems-
-Kutless-


Tomorrow's a new day.

He has been a constant companion for 12 years. He's been there, always there. Like air or something. And now she's decided to let him go.

She can't recall a time when he wasn't there. He was always there. He's just that way. Even when it seems like he wasn't. He was still there. And today she's letting him off the hook.

He was the only constant thing in her life. And somehow, facing the day without him would make her vulnerable. But she has to let herself go.

Today's their last day. She'll never forget that moment. The way he looked exactly the same but only completely different. The hardest part is how you quickly she had to move on.

He'll still be there. As always. She wouldn't, though.

What, now?

Am I really?

Ask me again on Wednesday.
Maybe then, we could go on Sunday.

Of Fishes and Dreams

With all the hassle of preparing your pole,
putting on the bait,
casting the line,
waiting...waiting...waiting,
finally, a bite!

Reel in,
carefully...careful...careful.
Or the line might break.

Once caught,
you look over it,
examine it,
decide.
Too young.
Too small.
Not the one you were fishing for...
So you throw it back.
All weak, and battered, and tired.
Not even sure if it could still survive.
But who cares?
At least you put it back.
Poor little fella'.

Why not just dive right in?
And swim with the fishes.
Join them underwater.
Be one with them.

You're in their world now.
You are the catch.
Be free
Belong
Be loved
This is real.
It could be.
You just need to learn how to breathe.

Meant

Tonight's a beautiful night. Maybe it's the moonlight shining through the leaves, she thought.

He turned to her and said, "Nice! Moonlight's shining through the leaves"
What the?!?

Was it possible? Could there be some kind of cosmic explanation for him?

He says things even before she could think them.
He does things she is just about to.
He walks right in front of her path.

Inexplicable irony. So different to the sense yet so alike down to the last subtle quirk. Yin and Yang. Black and White. Night and Day. Opposites attract.

Opposites attract. They do. With a loud clang they bond and stick and blend and morph. Until they become one. Through a shroud of oblivion, the unseen force draws them together. And resistance is applied but to no avail.

They surrender. Shackled and all. They break free. A blind leap. Complete trust on kismet.

Seen

Fate has presented her with a mirror and she's looking right at it but she is not seeing herself. Instead, an image completely different from her but mimicing her every move, repeating her every words, echoing the silence of her thoughts.

She has found her parallel destiny on the other side of the looking glass. She sees him so near, yet so far. She presses her hand against the cold pane. He does the same tracing the contours of her hand. Warmth emitting from their touch forming steam around their fingers.

What they would give to break down that barrier.
But for now, they will stay still and marvel.

He is not for her to touch.
And she is not for him to hold.

I belong. I'm sorry you can't

You chose her

I was here,
you wanted me,
so you asked me.

I gave you the choice,
I let you own me,
I let you consume me.

And you chose her.

Why even ask if you're not gonna take?

Cruel.
Yes, that's the word.
You're sad and cruel.

Receptive Resistance

Someone very wise once said, "There is no greater courage than the one who kisses first."

I wish I had that courage.
To come close.
To smile.
To give a hug.
To lean in for a kiss.
But I don't.

I stand in the corner and wait.
I wait in vain for a chance.
For an encounter.
For a moment.

I choose to stand witness
and not get too close.
I let things happen around me
without getting involved.

I observe.
I am an audience to life.
I see things and tell stories.
I feel things and write emotions.
Not mine though.

I'd like to stay here
Just be here
And when you finally come to realize me
I will be here
Just here
Knowing you'll have the courage for the both of us
And kiss me first

Kiss me
And I will be the lasting silence
The silence that screams a thousand lovers' glee

Kiss me
As I remain still

Kiss me

Hush now, I'm here.

You can't just care and care about someone and they don't do anything back.

And yet I did.
I do.
And I don't mind.

For I choose to converse with you in silence.
And I choose to adore you from a distance.
And I choose to hold you in my dreams.
But loving you, I have no control over.

I love you.
Maybe if I'm lucky,
that will go away.

Cornball Mush

I love it when you say hi
I love it when you say bye
I love that you can't cry
I love that you still try

In a crowd, next to me you stand
And you make me hold your hand
All eyes look forward
But yours subtly look sidewards

You call just to ask your stupid question
I hang up on you in frustration
You call back and laugh at me
I pick up. Baby, you're irresistible, can't you see?

I love your silence
I love your voice
I love your temper
I love your patience
I love your authority
I love your humility
I love your stupidity
I love your maturity
I love your playfulness
I love your discipline
I love...
I love...
I love you, period!

*barf!*

Even so

"Teach me to fly," the chicken said to the hawk.

"You can't," said the hawk.

"But why? I have wings," the chicken insisted.

"You just can't." And the hawk flew away.

Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies

Honey, do I look fat?

No, you're fine.

I look fat!

Then why do even need to ask if you won't hear what I say???

Labo mo men!

Minimal Brain Activity

"I want you to get swept away. I want you to levitate. I want you to sing with rapture and dance like a dervish. Be deliriously happy. Or at least leave yourself open to be. Stay open. Who knows? Lightning could strike.”
-Bill Parish [Anthony Hopkins] Meet Joe Black

Lightning struck.

And it fried her pea-sized brain!

Pity.

for auld lang syne my dear, for auld lang syne...

10

He looked around the room for her. Somewhere between the champagne fountain, the salsa dish and the cellery sticks he lost her.

9

A blur of faces passed him. Trying hard to fight the alcohol from taking over his motor functions, he grabbed the railing.

8

Laughter surrounded him. Tinsel, conffetti, glitter and silly string.

7

Lovers embrace, friends touch, he feels.

6

Still searching, longing, missing.

5

And then he found her.

4

And time stopped.

3

And he could feel his whole world spin.

2

He watched her from a distance.

1

In the arms of the man she loves.


Happy new year my love!